• 19th February
    2012
  • 19

A man’s guide for men regarding female contraception, female reproductive choice, how to not be a dick, and (especially if you are a man) minding your own goddamn business.

missworded:

lucillebruise:

anglophonicblog:

TRIGGER WARNING FOR:  common sense things that every man should already know, but probably doesn’t.  I apologize if some of these seem ridiculous.

-

I know that I am a lot older than most heterosexual men in the blogosphere.

So first of all, in this hour of bat-shit mansplaining hysteria, if you have some sort of bizarre urge to make ultimatums to the woman in your life…kindly fuck right the hell off. 

You are a dick, stop talking.

Because I myself have made many grave errors over the years, I thought it might be helpful to offer up some situational tips which I have learned with regard to me, my girlfriend and her private health decisions.

If your partner says “Please put on a condom,” the correct response is:

“Okay.”

If she says:

“I’m not ready for sex”

You say:

“Okay.”

ADDITIONALLY:

“I don’t want to have sex with you.”

“Okay.”

“I would like to go on the pill.”

“Okay”

“I don’t want to go on the pill…ever.  I need YOU to use birth control.”

“Okay.”

“Even though we’ve had sex every 5 minutes for the past 5 years, I don’t want to have sex with you (right now/today/tomorrow/for awhile/ever again).”

“Okay.”

“I need to go to Planned Parenthood.”

“Okay.”

“Can you please take me to Planned Parenthood?”

“Okay.”

“I don’t want to talk about it (no matter what ‘it’ is).”

“Okay.”

“I don’t want to have kids.”

“Okay.”

“I am not ready to be pregnant.”

“Okay.”

“I need an abortion, you are the reason I am pregnant, I need you to pay (all/some/part) of it, so will you please be involved in this process so that I don’t have to do it alone?”

“Okay, and ps…I love you very much.”

Et cetera, et cetera. 

I know I am leaving out 100 other situations, but I hope you gentlemen are smart enough to see where this is going. If there is ever any question whatsoever as to what your partner needs to do for her own self (involving healthcare, contraception, sex, or ANY FUCKING DECISIONS AT ALL, period…infinity) with regard her own body, the answer is always

“Okay.”

When it comes to your partner’s (or any woman’s) body, SHE is the fucking boss.  You are the lucky man who gets to know her.

Don’t you ever forget it.

Honorary shitass, Y/Y?

(Source: blog-anglophonic, via ashlynnbast)

  1. petrichloroform reblogged this from scatteredwords
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  4. queertoday reblogged this from apparitionbasedinquiry
  5. cmmndrcuddlemuffin reblogged this from hellodayglo
  6. fireinthefadingmoon reblogged this from lobalita and added:
    Ok, I’m all for women being in control of their bodies and even more so that as a man I will (if I’m lucky enough) NEVER...
  7. delineatingkaj reblogged this from fyeahgenderqueers
  8. ageostrophy reblogged this from oogishkamaanisee
  9. myblogyounocanhas reblogged this from missgingerlee
  10. useyourcharm reblogged this from lobalita
  11. tomrizzettatomtomrizzetta reblogged this from potterhead and added:
    in that case. that makes sense.
  12. potterhead reblogged this from tomrizzettatomtomrizzetta and added:
    anglophonicblog:...I think what it means is that if the woman doesn’t want to take birth...
  13. aperturebear reblogged this from fucktheground and added:
    Honestly in love with this girl.
  14. slamtera reblogged this from fucktheground
  15. fucktheground reblogged this from aperturebear and added:
    So, here’s the thing…this just strikes me as wrong. In theory, this is just a super sweet concept, do what she wants or...
  16. phelsco reblogged this from bonesandbirch
  17. ubeki-beki-beki-beki-stan-stan reblogged this from loungejulius
  18. dragongoddess reblogged this from missgingerlee
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  20. itllbevery reblogged this from blog-anglophonic
  21. loungejulius reblogged this from missgingerlee
  22. wrenchwench reblogged this from behindahazelbranch and added:
    yes yes yes a thousand times yes
  23. behindahazelbranch reblogged this from kool-aid4porchmonkey
  24. courtfucius reblogged this from thesecyclingtrivialities and added:
    The potential rejection of these questions has been a deep, deep rooted fear for many years
  25. m-0-l-l-y reblogged this from righteousblasphemy
  26. bonesandbirch reblogged this from righteousblasphemy
  27. righteousblasphemy reblogged this from missgingerlee
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