• 5th July
    2012
  • 05
People associate mental disorder with violence. We found that crime and mental disorder are linked, but not in the way people think: Persons with severe mental disorders are terribly vulnerable to victimization.

Linda Teplin, discussing her research paper ‘Crime victimization in adults with severe mental illness’ (This paper is under paid access, but free articles summarizing it can be read here and here)

Which is one of the ways ability informs rape culture - people with disabilities are far more likely to be victims than abled people.  People with disabilities are dehumanized and infantalized in ways that make them easier to victimize by abusers and makes it harder for them to get taken seriously if/when they report their abuse (assuming that they’re even capable of reporting it at all which isn’t always the case).

(via rapeculturerealities)

(Source: mindovermatterzine, via sacet)

  • 14th February
    2012
  • 14

I’m glad to see that the Valentine’s card essentially making fun of myself is popular today. See, I still have a sense of humor.

And while we’re on the topic, let’s get something straight, internet. We NEVER sexted or exchanged photos or any of that stuff. How I got thrown into that group of people is beyond me. (Ok let’s be real…people figured there’s no way I wasn’t doing something ‘dirty’ simply because of my job. Yay for stereotyping!) 

Now that we’ve cleared that up, could people at least get their shit straight when referencing anything having to do with in that giant clusterfuck? It’s slightly annoying when I have to read/be told/hear things about myself that aren’t even within the realm of fact.

  • 28th November
    2010
  • 28
farzananeversleeps:

I’m a lesbian so i must have a crush on every girl i see.
I have alot of guy friends so i must be fucking every single one of them.
I smile alot, so i must have the perfect life.
I listen to reggae, so I must be a stoner.
My opinion matters, so I must be a bitch.
Im comfortable with my body, so I get around?
 Im friends with a lot of guys, so I’ve must have hooked up with all of them.
 I like to help out, so I must be a suck up.
I’m black, so I must be ghetto.
I’m black, so I must be stupid.
I’m Mexican, so I must be low class.
I’m bisexual, so I must get around.
I’m straight up blunt, so I must be a bitch.
I like to drink, so I must be an alcoholic.
I don’t hang out with guys, so I must be a lesbian.
I cut myself so I must be emo.
I’m bisexual, so none of my girl friends can feel safe.
I laugh and smile, so I cannot be depressed.
I like spending my day at home, so I don’t have any friends
I am gay, so i must be bullied
Most of my friends are dudes, so I must be a tomboy.
I’m on Tumblr, so I must have zero friends in real life
I’m a Muslim, so I must be a terrorist
I make alot of mistakes so I must be stupid/retarded.
I strongly defend LGBT so I must be gay.
I’m from a broken family, so I must be a rebel.

farzananeversleeps:

I’m a lesbian so i must have a crush on every girl i see.

I have alot of guy friends so i must be fucking every single one of them.

I smile alot, so i must have the perfect life.

I listen to reggae, so I must be a stoner.

My opinion matters, so I must be a bitch.

Im comfortable with my body, so I get around?

 Im friends with a lot of guys, so I’ve must have hooked up with all of them.

 I like to help out, so I must be a suck up.

I’m black, so I must be ghetto.

I’m black, so I must be stupid.

I’m Mexican, so I must be low class.

I’m bisexual, so I must get around.

I’m straight up blunt, so I must be a bitch.

I like to drink, so I must be an alcoholic.

I don’t hang out with guys, so I must be a lesbian.

I cut myself so I must be emo.

I’m bisexual, so none of my girl friends can feel safe.

I laugh and smile, so I cannot be depressed.

I like spending my day at home, so I don’t have any friends

I am gay, so i must be bullied

Most of my friends are dudes, so I must be a tomboy.

I’m on Tumblr, so I must have zero friends in real life

I’m a Muslim, so I must be a terrorist

I make alot of mistakes so I must be stupid/retarded.

I strongly defend LGBT so I must be gay.

I’m from a broken family, so I must be a rebel.

(via smile-until-its-true)

  • 15th November
    2010
  • 15
I asked as an anonymous because anyone can see this and I value my privacy much in the same way you value yours (unless you're willing to tell us your real name).

Once again you're pretending that people in the adult entertainment industry don't have a higher proclivity for addiction than other professions. Doctors don't hang out offering each other meth or whatever. I'm gonna have a harder time finding a lawyer to blow me for a pocketful of Xanax. Even Drew Pinsky says that being in your industry is a strong indication you may be an addict of some kind. I'm sure you don't think a dude with some 30 years of experience treating addicts is only believing what he sees on television.

Asked by: stillanon

Considering there is a person that has tried to kill the ‘real’ me and stalks me like it’s going out of style, no, I’m not posting my real name. The world knows me as Ginger, and there are damn good reasons for it. Something about being in the public eye 24/7, having death threats, and spending more time than I care to admit sitting in a courtroom makes a person take privacy a bit more seriously than a ‘regular’ person. I’m guessing you’re a ‘regular’ person who just wants to hide behind an internet screen. You don’t care about privacy, you care about remaining faceless.

I’m not pretending about anything. I’m saying that I have been in this industry long enough to know that addiction is present, but it is nowhere near the way you make it out to be. We’re not lesser beings or something. I don’t know what clubs you’ve been to, or what point you’re trying to make by telling me that I have no idea how ‘bad’ the industry I work in is, but seriously…if you aren’t a dancer, you don’t know squat. 

And Dr Drew is on tv. He says shit for ratings. It’s a money making enterprise, they’re  not trying to ‘help’ people, they’re trying to get viewers by having characters that people want to watch. Just like America’s Next Top Model is in no way a correct picture of the modeling industry, a show where people are already addicts going into treatment so that millions of people can watch them….it’s all done for ratings. 

PS…I’m beginning to have a sneaking suspicion that I know who you are…and if you are that person, give it a rest. 

  • 15th November
    2010
  • 15
I've seen you make the argument many times that "people from all walks of life engage in self-destructive behavior", and I've gotta say it's an incredibly flawed argument. Are there alcoholic lawyers? Sure. Are there normal strippers? I've never encountered one but I'll go ahead and allow it. The bottom line though, is that there's a significantly higher percentage of strippers and porn stars engaging in self-destructive behavior than there are lawyers, doctors etc. To dismiss it with a "well other people do it" is to ignore that very distinct fact.

Asked by: Anonymous

I like that you had to ask this anonymously. That gives me warm fuzzies.

I’m not ignoring that there are people in the adult industry that engage in self destructive behavior. I’ve seen it with my own eyes. However, I’ve also been all over this country and met thousands of dancers that were perfectly good people. It’s not always that the percentage of drugs and alcohol abusing individuals is higher, it’s that it’s not hidden from view the way it is in normal society. The difference between the stereotype of ‘broken/drug addicted/alcoholic strippers and people that are that way in ‘real’ jobs is that that’s what people seem to expect out of strippers and not from the ‘regular’ folks. 

There are also quite a few girls that ‘act the part’ when they’re at work. Pretending to be dumber than a rock and acting like we’re drunk is far easier than actually trying to engage some of the patrons in real conversation. I’ve had tons of guys tell me that because I don’t get wasted I’m ‘no fun’, as well as a ton that got intimidated by my opinions of things about life in general, so it’s easier to pretend that I find everything they say and do to be total genius so it strokes their ego a bit. There are white knights that want to ‘save’ us if we appear to be broken. And sometimes, maybe sometimes, there are guys that just want a girl to have a good time with. Until you’ve spent the time I have dealing with dancers both in a club and outside of one (you know, when they let us out of our cages to roam the streets) with those very same people, you don’t know jack about dancers.

Stop believing what you see on tv, or what you see going on inside a club. Good dancers only let you see what we want you to see. I change my personality depending on the guy I’m with. Stripping (at least for me) is like the longest sitcom ever made, and I can be a kick ass actress when it’s time to be Ginger. I’m playing a character, yo. 

  • 6th November
    2010
  • 06
Not a question this time around. I just wanted to say that I really enjoy reading your musings, and through you (inadvertently or not), I've found a number of other interesting, intelligently written blogs by dancers, including Ava Adore and "Diary of an Angry Stripper." I love the fact that you and these other fabulous ladies so thoroughly destroy the "airheaded stripper" stereotype.

Asked by: tamwood

I love my articulate stripper/sex worker friends. If it weren’t for people like them, I’d likely lose my mind on somebody one of these days. I’m glad that reading my random thoughts and feelings made it easier to find some of the other ladies that are anything but a ‘stereotypical stripper’.
Stereotypes are made to be broken.